How to Get a Girl to Like You
Steps
- Have your own life.
If you tend to fall into the "friend zone", this will be especially
important. Real girls (girls with a strong sense of purpose and
self-worth) don't like guys who have no lives, and who cling to them
like plastic wrap. Some girls do like that, but for all the wrong
reasons—–either they're insecure and needy for attention, or they're
control freaks who have a need for dominating guys. Unless you want to
sign up for either of those scenarios, focus filling your time with your
own friendships, interest, hobbies and goals.
- Make an impression. There's no one-size-fits-all solution here. What impresses one girl might make another roll her eyes. Your best bet is to be yourself.
Demonstrate a unique skill, talent or something difficult to do that
you're proud of, like playing guitar and singing in tune at the same
time, something that sets you apart from the crowd. Not only will this
make her feel good about you, but it can boost your confidence, too. Impress her, but do not boast too much about your great achievements and plans.
- Be her friend.
Girls don't just fall for random strangers. (Well, some do, but the
relationship never goes very far!) If you're in the same lecture or
tutorial as her, find out her name. Every time she walks into the room,
smile at her. Sometimes this is all it takes for a young woman to notice
you. At the same time though, don't do this too often! It will just end
up looking like you're obsessed with her. But if you talk to other
women too, like friends of yours, then she'll see that you're all there.
If she doesn't seem to see you, when she walks by, just say "Hi
_______," in a friendly way. This way she'll know you exist.
- If she's shy, she might just smile back, so don't take this as a sign that she doesn't like you!
- If you want your relationship to move ahead, don't get stuck in the
quicksand - that is the 'Friend Zone'. Sometimes a girl won't go out
with you because she's afraid if the relationship ends badly, she'll
lose your friendship! To start moving things along, be a little flirty; a
woman will only be intimate with a man she knows, trusts and cares
about, and this can only be achieved with taking the time to get to know
her through friendly chat.
- Speak to her. Don't
just admit that you like her, then be completely silent. If you talk to
her once in a while, then she knows you still like her. If you're
completely silent, then she will think that you don't like her and she
won't like you either. If your conversation skills need a polish, read a
few of these:
- Flirt. When you see or meet a girl you like, make brief eye contact and smile. Strike up a casual conversation. Most importantly, relax. The more you talk to girls,
the more relaxed you'll become. Don't think of her as the girl of your
dreams; don't worry about what will happen if you make a bad joke, or if
you have something stuck to your teeth. She may be just as nervous, and
small mistakes will likely go unnoticed or will simply be ignored.
Enjoy interacting with this attractive, friendly girl whose path crossed
yours. Live in the moment. Just be careful that you don't get so caught up in the moment that you say or do something you might regret later.
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Talk to her. Tell her what you really enjoy in life, what gets you excited and find out what gets her excited. Be positive. If you had a bad day, still greet her pleasantly with a big smile. Most importantly, listen to everything she says.
Whether she talks about herself, her family, hobbies or anything, pay
attention. Some things could be useful or important to know later in the
relationship. Nod to show that you're listening, and also respond to
what she says so she knows that you really are listening. Women are very appreciative of guys who demonstrate sincere interest in what they say.
Be romantic.
The stereotypical icons of romance (roses, candles, chocolate and teddy
bears) can only go so far. Think about what really gets that special
someone excited. Recognize what makes her unique; find and do things
that only she would appreciate. What are her quirky (perhaps secret)
interests, obsessions and fantasies? Whenever she's shopping, talking,
or watching a movie, what makes her eyes light up? Pay attention! Girls
easily notice if you still remember things they told you a long while
ago. Being romantic means acknowledging how special a person is, and
that means demonstrating that you know––better than anyone else in the
world—–what makes her unique.
Break the touch barrier. There are several ways to touch a girl without being sleazy.
Hold her coat while she puts it on. Offer her your hand when she's
stepping on an uneven surface. Hold out your hand so you can lead her
through a crowd. If she's worried, put your hand lightly on her shoulder
to comfort her. These are all polite ways to get a little closer to
someone without being creepy. Women feel touch more sensitively than
most men, even if they put up a tough front, so make sure the touching
is light; for example, don't slap her on the back. If you see any signs
of discomfort, stop! Otherwise, she'll probably enjoy the affection.
Compliment her.
If you really like someone, you probably appreciate a lot of things
about her. Why not let her know? If anything is different or new (her
hairstyle, nail polish color, shirt, etc.), make note of it. The more
unique the compliment, the better received it will be, unless she's
shallow. Most girls like being complimented on something that makes them
distinct, not something that plenty of other women have. If you
compliment her appearance, try to be original, perhaps by specifying a
particular feature. Better yet, compliment her personality or skills. If
you're not sure what's good or bad complimenting, read How to Compliment Girls.
- You can tell her she's beautiful only about once or twice. If you're going to compliment her,
compliment her on her personality, how good she is at something, how
she does things, etc. If she's very pretty, it's likely that several
other guys have already mentioned it to her; it may sound trite after a
while. Complimenting her appearance too much may make her think you're
shallow and maybe that you just want to have sex with her, and you don't
want to give that impression.
- Make her laugh.
Telling jokes or funny stories is a classic way to make a person laugh,
but not the only way. Find out which are her favorite comedians, funny
movies, or sitcoms. Watch them with her. Be bold
and think of some antics that will make her laugh. Tell her to dare you
to do something, then do it (as long as it's not illegal, of course).
Laughter will come by itself if both of you are relaxed and enjoying
each other's company.
- Ask her out.
Invite her to go somewhere or to do something with you. Make sure it's
something that you're both interested in. If you want, show her your
world. Bring her somewhere that you feel comfortable and preferably,
where you have or do something you're proud of. Alternatively, you can
express interest in seeing her world. Is she a musician? Ask if you can
see her perform. Is she a mathematician? Ask to read her report or
thesis. If you aren't yet ready or comfortable with the idea of sharing
your personal lives to that extent, just go out for lunch or do
something simple together, maybe with a small group of friends, where
you can get to know her better.
- Look Good. Keep yourself in good shape and well groomed. Work out run a mile or two, do some sit ups, get a six pack,
etc. Just don't overdo it; girls don't like it when you have too many
muscles, as that just shows that you love your muscles possibly more
than you'd love her. The main point is to keep fit. And whatever your
age or looks, being well groomed will set you apart from men who can't
be bothered. Every girl likes to know that the guy she's keen on looks
after himself and cares about his presentation to the world.
- If you want to get a woman to like you, basic cleanliness and
appearance makes a huge difference on your success in the dating zone.
Brush your teeth, shave etc. When you take care of yourself, it makes
you more appealing to others, whether dating or not, and it will have an
impact on your level of confidence. If you are going to see that
"special someone", make sure you're feeling and looking your best. Girls
notice things like bad breath, scruffy faces and greasy hair before
they notice that winning personality. Give them a chance to see your
good qualities by making a good first impression.
- Give her high value.
Women want to feel important and valued; do not pay only two pennies
for her when she knows she is worth fifty pennies, figuratively
speaking. When communicating with her, make an effort to say more rather
than less and to keep things personal rather than generic. When you
want to ask her out or to do something with you, ask in person,
preferably at her home. She needs to know that you're prepared to go the
extra mile and not wuss out on her.
- After there’s a bit of
mutual attraction, start throwing out low-level “bait”––little jokes
that hint at interest––to see if she bites. A good baiting statement
should be light and playful, and usually ambiguous. There’s a certain
look a woman will give you if you get that right (and if she’s the right
girl to begin with). It’s like you gave her the secret handshake.
She’ll look back at you for a couple of seconds, wondering if you “get
it” or if you just accidentally stumbled on the right words. When she
does this, hold eye contact, and don’t react. Wait for her to say the
next thing. “Baiting” is how women flirt too, so be on the lookout for
things she might be “joking” about or things that could have a double
meaning.
- Take your time.
Don't be pushy or needy. Nice girls normally need longer time than boys
to develop deeper feelings. Continue courting her by following the steps
above, but don't rush things. If you end up in a relationship with this
girl, she'll always remember how you made her feel when you were just
getting to know each other. Make her feel appreciated, not invisible or
smothered. Do the chase slowly, gently but steadily, to allow her to get
accustomed to a new man in her life, reduce the fear of sexual advances
(if any), and for you to look less desperate. Do not force the
relationship; carefully look for clues on where and when you can see her
again.
- Be yourself.
You are unique. Be the authentic you. Bring out your best. Let her know
you as who you truly are. Use your talents, gifts, and strengths and
let yourself be known. If you have great sense of humor, share that with
her. If you love science, music, poetry, politics, or sports, let her
know what you love. The right woman will fall for you and love you just
the way you are.
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